Craft Wars

It's become a mission of mine to search out any craft show to help inspire me to create and be creative.  Mostly, I find some wonderful little shows on youtube or a neat little website called MyCraftChannel.com.  Cable TV has jack-squat when it comes to crafting and scrapbook shows.  Its the same 3 ladies who have been doing these shows for years and their styles haven't changed at all.  I actually watched one last week with a chick who years and years ago used to use Mrs Grossman stickers on everything.  Last week's show had her as a special guest and she was still using those stupid Mrs. Grossman stickers.  I apologize to those readers who are not even the slightest form of a scrapbooker, because I am sure you have absolutely no clues as to what I am talking about.  I certainly won't apologize to anyone who likes Mrs Grossman stickers however, because basically Mrs. Grossman stickers are the most boring and bland thing you could possibly use on your scrapbook page.  Mrs. Grossman stickers are what you promise to your kid at the scrapbook store if he behaves and manages to not get you kicked out of the store.  Why?  Because they are cheap and cheap looking and you won't feel bad peeling them off your car window, since you are just thankful these ugly things didn't make it onto one of your precious pages!  I kind of feel the same about Mrs. Grossmans stickers as I do the craft shows on TV these day, and yet, though I find myself cursing at the TV during the bulk of the program, I can't get myself to stop watching Craft Wars on TLC.  It is like Cupcake Wars, which Wyatt and I love to observe the bakers creating little yummy miniature masterpieces and try to choose who will be the winners.  One episode was all men bakers and the winner baked a creation for the cast of Yo Gabba Gabba.  Wyatt's brain about exploded.  Because of our love for this show and my love for crafting, Craft Wars was a must on our DVR.  Did I mention it is hosted by Tori Spelling of the 90210 fame?  And did you know that Tori is a crafter?  A crafter?  She has more money then anyone I know and she spends her time with a glue gun and styrofoam?????  Well, I try not to let that bother me, because there are plenty of other things that do bother me about this show.  First of all, the supplies they give the contestants are CRAP.  Yes, CRAP!  They give them a pile of junk and then tell them to make a specific something stupid out of it.  I have not once looked at a pile of crap and decided to make a craft out of it.  If there is something I want to make, I go to the craft store and buy the supplies and make it.  Does that make me less creative than say someone who would use a pile of crap?  Perhaps.  But still, I can say my creation was not and never has been CRAP.  My next critique are the judges.  Crafting is supposed to be a happy thing people, and yet if I hear the judges complain about using the wrong kind of glue one more time, I'll be using a real gun instead of a glue gun.  Honestly, you give the contestants 1 hour to make a pillow out of old stuffed animals (told you, crap).  That fabric glue that takes 5 million hours to dry is soooo not going to get used.  And since crafting is a very objective activity, a judge does not need to give a suggestion that would completely change the contestant's project.  "Well what you should have done...blah blah blah."  Nobody cares about your ideas.  You either like the project or you don't.
My, my, I'm quite angry about a crafting show, aren't I?  Why did I allow all this anger to surface?  Not really sure about the anger, but really just wanted to talk about the fun Wyatt and I had creating our own Craft War.  I should have taped it, because I'm sure our rating would have outdone ol' Tori and her fake boobs.  I will say this, the craft did have to come from some form of crap...a cardboard box, but thats a little more common then making patio furniture from a broken up surfboard (seriously, they did that...and it was crap). 

Along with the rules of using the cardboard box, the creation needed to be a useful item.  Wyatt made a cardboard pretend oven for Carter to play with (which I will never let Carter 5 feet near that thing since Wyatt decided to use metal hooks and push pins on it, just don't tell Wyatt that) and I created a vase with flowers.  I'm oddly a little too proud of my vase.  I used all sort of techniques on it, and I must say is pretty fabulous.  The best thing about that day was it completely filled out afternoon, it destroyed my crafting space, and I got out of folding clothes.  There wasn't a tv on, there was no complaining of boredom, or pleading to stop playing games on the phone.  It was a perfect, creative afternoon with my boy.

 I really thought I had a good shot for the grand prize (which was nothing, by the way), but because of his excellent use of recycled materials, Judge Byron granted first place to Wyatt.  I'm pretty sure the contest was fixed.